Top 11 Greens to Use in Your Green Smoothies
1 year ago
Thursday, March 4, 2010
New Additions to our Family Blog - HEALTH BLOGS and SITES
I thought it would be helpful to add some of the new HEALTH BLOGS we have been discovering that would be WORTH your time to read...
I added links to other HEALTH companies...also, for consideration...
In my recent studies of the WORD OF WISDOM, I am REDISCOVERING...the VALUE of this latter-day revelation...and how much...we have all neglected the DO's of this incredible counsel from the Lord...
Why is it...that we have something so valuable as the WORD OF WISDOM...and yet...have not truly studied it out in our minds...as to the BLESSINGS it contains...Without our health...we are limited in what we can do each day...
We each have a MISSION to fullfil in THIS LIFE...but, it takes every bit of STRENGTH...and HEALTH...to do all that is required of us...
I added links to other HEALTH companies...also, for consideration...
In my recent studies of the WORD OF WISDOM, I am REDISCOVERING...the VALUE of this latter-day revelation...and how much...we have all neglected the DO's of this incredible counsel from the Lord...
Why is it...that we have something so valuable as the WORD OF WISDOM...and yet...have not truly studied it out in our minds...as to the BLESSINGS it contains...Without our health...we are limited in what we can do each day...
We each have a MISSION to fullfil in THIS LIFE...but, it takes every bit of STRENGTH...and HEALTH...to do all that is required of us...
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
The LIVING Saga of Garvin Smith – are you dying to read it? PART 4 by Garvin Smith
Today was a “bad” day. Overall I feel pretty good and have for some time. But in the afternoon I bumped into the director of the nursing program. We talked, and my situation was discussed. She mentioned that she noticed that I didn’t look too good, but didn’t want to say anything. She said my coloring was poor. I said, “What, like someone who is dying?” She responded in the affirmative. (Everybody else says how much better I look than I did a few weeks ago. But we put more weight on the opinions of those in the medical field.) So I have been struggling with my attitude today, trying to stay positive.
Tonight was especially difficult, with Debbie in Provo with Angel and their new baby. I longed for her to be by my side and to comfort me. I felt alone. But almost immediately my self pity turned to sorrow as I thought about our Savior and his loneliness in working out the great and Eternal atonement. While in the Garden He was strengthened by an angel while all of His earthly friends slept. But when He hung on the cross, alone, and according to Elder McConkie, “all the pains and sorrow of Gethsemane returned”, He was alone, so alone. I wept for Him, and my bowels swelled with compassion, for Him, who suffered so much. And I was reminded that he suffered exactly what Garvin is suffering (not just what any large B-Cell lymphoma patient suffers, but what I particularly am suffering) so that He is able to succor me in my time of need. I testify this is true. What love! What mercy! What charity! The great condescension of God! (1Ne. 11: 16, 26; 2Ne. 4:26; 9:53; Jacob 4:7)
But then I thought of Darrell Pierce, who is alone every night with no one to comfort him in his battle with cancer, and I wished I had been more compassionate and charitable when I had the opportunity to be so. I’m sorry Darrell.
Now maybe I can get some sleep.
To be continued . . .
Tonight was especially difficult, with Debbie in Provo with Angel and their new baby. I longed for her to be by my side and to comfort me. I felt alone. But almost immediately my self pity turned to sorrow as I thought about our Savior and his loneliness in working out the great and Eternal atonement. While in the Garden He was strengthened by an angel while all of His earthly friends slept. But when He hung on the cross, alone, and according to Elder McConkie, “all the pains and sorrow of Gethsemane returned”, He was alone, so alone. I wept for Him, and my bowels swelled with compassion, for Him, who suffered so much. And I was reminded that he suffered exactly what Garvin is suffering (not just what any large B-Cell lymphoma patient suffers, but what I particularly am suffering) so that He is able to succor me in my time of need. I testify this is true. What love! What mercy! What charity! The great condescension of God! (1Ne. 11: 16, 26; 2Ne. 4:26; 9:53; Jacob 4:7)
But then I thought of Darrell Pierce, who is alone every night with no one to comfort him in his battle with cancer, and I wished I had been more compassionate and charitable when I had the opportunity to be so. I’m sorry Darrell.
Now maybe I can get some sleep.
To be continued . . .
Monday, March 1, 2010
Husband and Wife
“Let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” (Ephesians 5:33)
God made Adam first and put him in the Garden with a job to do, a mission to fulfill. In the heart of every fallen man is the self-doubt that wonders, “Am I man enough to climb this mountain God has called me to? Can I fulfill my destiny?” A wise wife will understand that question at the center of her husband’s heart. And she will spend her life answering it, communicating to him in various ways, “Honey, I believe in your call. I know you can do this, by God’s power. Go for it.” In this way, she will breathe life into her man.
God made Eve from Adam, for Adam, to help him follow the call. In the heart of every fallen woman is the self-doubt that wonders, “Do I please you? Am I what you wanted?” A wise husband will understand that question at the center of his wife’s heart. And he will spend his life answering it, communicating to her in various ways, “Darling, you are the one I need. I cherish you. Let me hold you close.” In this way, he will breathe life into his wife.
God made Adam first and put him in the Garden with a job to do, a mission to fulfill. In the heart of every fallen man is the self-doubt that wonders, “Am I man enough to climb this mountain God has called me to? Can I fulfill my destiny?” A wise wife will understand that question at the center of her husband’s heart. And she will spend her life answering it, communicating to him in various ways, “Honey, I believe in your call. I know you can do this, by God’s power. Go for it.” In this way, she will breathe life into her man.
God made Eve from Adam, for Adam, to help him follow the call. In the heart of every fallen woman is the self-doubt that wonders, “Do I please you? Am I what you wanted?” A wise husband will understand that question at the center of his wife’s heart. And he will spend his life answering it, communicating to her in various ways, “Darling, you are the one I need. I cherish you. Let me hold you close.” In this way, he will breathe life into his wife.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
The LIVING Saga of Garvin Smith – are you dying to read it? PART 3 by Garvin Smith
I went in for a PET scan Friday, February 26. Earlier I had a CT (CAT) scan (see my earlier post on this subject). Not that I am skeptical about modern medicine, but if you had these two scans you just might wonder like me. The same machine is used, and with the CT scan, you lay on your back, they put some dye in your blood, and you go into the machine feet first. But with the PET scan you also lay on your back, they put some radioactive sugar in your blood, but you go in head first! So far the main difference between the two experiences is the way you go into the tube. I suppose the stuff they put in you has something to do with the difference and possibly the way the machine works is different. I will get the results on Tuesday, March 2, 2010. I will then have a second blood test, and the results will be returned by Friday, March 5. But by then I will be traveling to Provo, Utah, to participate in the blessing of our thirteenth grandchild. So don’t expect any new news until after Tuesday, March 10.
However, I awoke this morning with greater insight to the scriptures, life, and the gospel. Praise the name of the Lord who hears and answers my prayers.
I thought of how I used to eat: anything and everything. I used to boast that I had a “cast iron” stomach. And I did! But after years of eating “nuclear radioactive” foods, my cast iron stomach gave way. Had I used zirconium clad stainless steel instead of cast iron I might still be slamming down those BLTs with a pound of bacon and the mayonnaise oozing out of the side. But I digress. The point is that to eat simply, used to be simply . . . painful! But recently I have been forced to change my eating habits. I remember eating dinner with Debbie recently and having simply an avocado with some tomato slices. Oh, how delectable, how scrumptious, how enjoyable! Just a short while ago I would have turned away from this simple meal after the food of the great and spacious building. (Actually an awesome blossom does sound pretty good right now!) But this morning as I remembered how good this simple meal of avocado and tomato tasted my memory was touched by the Spirit and this scripture came to mind: “. . . let thy food be prepared with singleness of heart that thy fasting may be perfect, or, in other words, that thy joy may be full. Verily, this is fasting and prayer, or in other words, rejoicing and prayer.” (D&C 59:13-14) It was now clear that the simple foods God gave us, would bring us joy and rejoicing! Oh, I’ll be the first to admit that lavish meals provide plenty of pleasure, but in this life we are to be seekers of joy and rejoicing, through obedience to God’s commandments, not seekers of the pleasure that is served up in the great and spacious building, e.g. awesome blossoms followed by a thick, juicy, tender, steak, and topped off with a fudge brownie and ice cream. (1Ne. 11: 35-36)
And then the promise, for God NEVER reveals a law designed to bring us joy and rejoicing without a providing a promise, so that our choices will be completely informed. And the promise is, “And inasmuch as ye do these things with thanksgiving, with cheerful hearts and countenances, not with much laughter, for this is sin, but with a glad heart and a cheerful countenance— Verily I say, that inasmuch as ye do this, the fullness of the earth is yours, the beasts of the field and the fowls of the air, and that which climbeth upon the trees and walketh upon the earth; Yea, and the herb, and the good things which come of the earth, whether for food or for raiment, or for houses, or for barns, or for orchards, or for gardens, or for vineyards; Yea, all things which come of the earth, in the season thereof, are made for the benefit and the use of man, both to please the eye and to gladden the heart; Yea, for food and for raiment, for taste and for smell, to strengthen the body and to enliven the soul. And it pleaseth God that he hath given all these things unto man; for unto this end were they made to be used, with judgment, not to excess, neither by extortion. (D&C 59:15-20)
My mind has been thus enlightened. As Debbie reads this, she is now jumping for joy herself.
Immediately following this enlightenment, my mind was prompted to think about this church. I testify that the Church of Jesus Christ is the Kingdom of God on the earth. Now, the Church either is, or isn’t, the Kingdom of God on the earth. But we must not only know this, we must ponder on it daily. For this knowledge will affect our actions. If this church is the Kingdom of God on earth, then we must be diligent in our duties. If this church is not the Kingdom of God on earth, then it doesn’t matter what we do, or how valiantly we perform our duties. Dip that thought in awesome blossom batter and eat it!
To be continued . . .
However, I awoke this morning with greater insight to the scriptures, life, and the gospel. Praise the name of the Lord who hears and answers my prayers.
I thought of how I used to eat: anything and everything. I used to boast that I had a “cast iron” stomach. And I did! But after years of eating “nuclear radioactive” foods, my cast iron stomach gave way. Had I used zirconium clad stainless steel instead of cast iron I might still be slamming down those BLTs with a pound of bacon and the mayonnaise oozing out of the side. But I digress. The point is that to eat simply, used to be simply . . . painful! But recently I have been forced to change my eating habits. I remember eating dinner with Debbie recently and having simply an avocado with some tomato slices. Oh, how delectable, how scrumptious, how enjoyable! Just a short while ago I would have turned away from this simple meal after the food of the great and spacious building. (Actually an awesome blossom does sound pretty good right now!) But this morning as I remembered how good this simple meal of avocado and tomato tasted my memory was touched by the Spirit and this scripture came to mind: “. . . let thy food be prepared with singleness of heart that thy fasting may be perfect, or, in other words, that thy joy may be full. Verily, this is fasting and prayer, or in other words, rejoicing and prayer.” (D&C 59:13-14) It was now clear that the simple foods God gave us, would bring us joy and rejoicing! Oh, I’ll be the first to admit that lavish meals provide plenty of pleasure, but in this life we are to be seekers of joy and rejoicing, through obedience to God’s commandments, not seekers of the pleasure that is served up in the great and spacious building, e.g. awesome blossoms followed by a thick, juicy, tender, steak, and topped off with a fudge brownie and ice cream. (1Ne. 11: 35-36)
And then the promise, for God NEVER reveals a law designed to bring us joy and rejoicing without a providing a promise, so that our choices will be completely informed. And the promise is, “And inasmuch as ye do these things with thanksgiving, with cheerful hearts and countenances, not with much laughter, for this is sin, but with a glad heart and a cheerful countenance— Verily I say, that inasmuch as ye do this, the fullness of the earth is yours, the beasts of the field and the fowls of the air, and that which climbeth upon the trees and walketh upon the earth; Yea, and the herb, and the good things which come of the earth, whether for food or for raiment, or for houses, or for barns, or for orchards, or for gardens, or for vineyards; Yea, all things which come of the earth, in the season thereof, are made for the benefit and the use of man, both to please the eye and to gladden the heart; Yea, for food and for raiment, for taste and for smell, to strengthen the body and to enliven the soul. And it pleaseth God that he hath given all these things unto man; for unto this end were they made to be used, with judgment, not to excess, neither by extortion. (D&C 59:15-20)
My mind has been thus enlightened. As Debbie reads this, she is now jumping for joy herself.
Immediately following this enlightenment, my mind was prompted to think about this church. I testify that the Church of Jesus Christ is the Kingdom of God on the earth. Now, the Church either is, or isn’t, the Kingdom of God on the earth. But we must not only know this, we must ponder on it daily. For this knowledge will affect our actions. If this church is the Kingdom of God on earth, then we must be diligent in our duties. If this church is not the Kingdom of God on earth, then it doesn’t matter what we do, or how valiantly we perform our duties. Dip that thought in awesome blossom batter and eat it!
To be continued . . .
This SABBATH DAY!
As I sat in Jared and Angel's Ward this morning...I wrote down IMPRESSIONS as they came to me...during the Sacrament meeting...
I have wondered what YOU...experience during your moments in a day...when the "windows of heaven" open up to you...
Example:
While we were singing...Hymn #27 "Praise to the Man"...I had such "tender feelings" come over me regarding the Prophet Joseph Smith...and this sense of DEEP GRATITUDE filled my heart....
While singing the "Sacrament Hymn" - "With Humble Heart" - the LAST VERSE truly touched my spirit..."As I walk daily here on earth - give me thy spirit as I seek - A CHANGE of HEART, another birth - And grow, dear Lord, to be LIKE THEE..."
I was just about to record that impression onto the program...when the FIRST SPEAKER stood up...and said...how she was "touched" by the last VERSE of this same hymn...(smile) I thought..."HOW COOL IS THAT!" That the Holy Ghost touched at least TWO of us...over the same verse!!!! (smile)
Second speaker...I thought of GARVIN...He quoted the parable...in Luke 17:12-19 - of the 10 lepers - whom the Lord cleansed...and only ONE return to express his GRATITUDE or his HEALING...Verse 17 "And Jesus answering said, Were there not ten cleansed? but where are the NINE?" Verse 18 "There are not found that returned to give GLORY to GOD, save this stranger. Verse 19 - "And he said unto him, Arise, go thy way: THY FAITH HATH MADE THEE WHOLE."
Well, Garvin...I just couldn't help but think of all those PRAYING over your health...FASTING for some...and YOUR FAITH in our FATHER!!!! "Thy FAITH HATH made thee WHOLE!"
I would LOVE it...if any of you...have MOMENTS...that you see God's hand in your life, it would be FANTASTIC if you would share with us...so that we may all be EDIFIED!!!
I LOVE YOU ALL SO VERY MUCH!!!! Mama
I have wondered what YOU...experience during your moments in a day...when the "windows of heaven" open up to you...
Example:
While we were singing...Hymn #27 "Praise to the Man"...I had such "tender feelings" come over me regarding the Prophet Joseph Smith...and this sense of DEEP GRATITUDE filled my heart....
While singing the "Sacrament Hymn" - "With Humble Heart" - the LAST VERSE truly touched my spirit..."As I walk daily here on earth - give me thy spirit as I seek - A CHANGE of HEART, another birth - And grow, dear Lord, to be LIKE THEE..."
I was just about to record that impression onto the program...when the FIRST SPEAKER stood up...and said...how she was "touched" by the last VERSE of this same hymn...(smile) I thought..."HOW COOL IS THAT!" That the Holy Ghost touched at least TWO of us...over the same verse!!!! (smile)
Second speaker...I thought of GARVIN...He quoted the parable...in Luke 17:12-19 - of the 10 lepers - whom the Lord cleansed...and only ONE return to express his GRATITUDE or his HEALING...Verse 17 "And Jesus answering said, Were there not ten cleansed? but where are the NINE?" Verse 18 "There are not found that returned to give GLORY to GOD, save this stranger. Verse 19 - "And he said unto him, Arise, go thy way: THY FAITH HATH MADE THEE WHOLE."
Well, Garvin...I just couldn't help but think of all those PRAYING over your health...FASTING for some...and YOUR FAITH in our FATHER!!!! "Thy FAITH HATH made thee WHOLE!"
I would LOVE it...if any of you...have MOMENTS...that you see God's hand in your life, it would be FANTASTIC if you would share with us...so that we may all be EDIFIED!!!
I LOVE YOU ALL SO VERY MUCH!!!! Mama
Made a MAJOR GOAL!!!!
It took me TWO MONTHS...to get to the weight I was LAST JANUARY 2009...when I first started this BLOG...(smile) I am THRILLED! I had to lose 13 pounds to get to that point...Now, I have to reach ANOTHER GOAL...the weight I had LOST in 2009...before...everything came UNDONE...by the middle of the year...when I regained those "11" pounds...and THEN another "15" on top of that....
But, this time...I am NOT DIETING...I have simply changed "lifestyle"...and that I am "Eating to LIVE" and NOT "Living to EAT"... WHAT A MAJOR DIFFERENCE!!!!
Garvin has now lost 27 pounds...
Angel, who is now on this blog...began her goal to LOSE weight...now that she has had her little "LILLIE ANNA" on February 16th...She had gained "45" pounds with this baby...Lost 20 some odd of it afterward the birth...but, then we set her "ticker"...and she has taken off a little over 2 pounds...
LAST YEAR...our FAMILY champions were HOLLY and ABRAHAM....Abe lost over 50-60 pounds...and Holly was over 40 pounds...(can't remember exact totals at the moment)
Anyway...been a GREAT week...and enjoying the BENEFITS...of this NEW LIFESTYLE...Has been AWESOME!!! Will be adding a POST on BLENDER foods...Sandee Spencer inspired me...along with my son-in-law, Jared...to RESEARCH....and we made a decision...YESTERDAY...and began our "blender" foods...Will explain more later...
But, this time...I am NOT DIETING...I have simply changed "lifestyle"...and that I am "Eating to LIVE" and NOT "Living to EAT"... WHAT A MAJOR DIFFERENCE!!!!
Garvin has now lost 27 pounds...
Angel, who is now on this blog...began her goal to LOSE weight...now that she has had her little "LILLIE ANNA" on February 16th...She had gained "45" pounds with this baby...Lost 20 some odd of it afterward the birth...but, then we set her "ticker"...and she has taken off a little over 2 pounds...
LAST YEAR...our FAMILY champions were HOLLY and ABRAHAM....Abe lost over 50-60 pounds...and Holly was over 40 pounds...(can't remember exact totals at the moment)
Anyway...been a GREAT week...and enjoying the BENEFITS...of this NEW LIFESTYLE...Has been AWESOME!!! Will be adding a POST on BLENDER foods...Sandee Spencer inspired me...along with my son-in-law, Jared...to RESEARCH....and we made a decision...YESTERDAY...and began our "blender" foods...Will explain more later...
Friday, February 19, 2010
The Dying Saga of Garvin Smith – are you dying to read it? PART 2 by Garvin Smith
Things are pretty much the same. I cancelled the scheduled lymph node biopsy that the oncologist claims is necessary to know exactly what type of lymphoma I have. While it is true that we can’t know exactly what type of lymphoma I have without a biopsy, since his recommended treatment is pretty much the same regardless of the type of lymphoma (see previous post) what does it matter what type I have? When I explained this to the oncologist it did not go well! Furthermore I have a fundamental problem with the hubris (pride so blinding one cannot see any other way) that exists in the medical field. Let me explain. 1) As late as the 1800s “bleeding” or “bloodletting” was a common medical practice. Doctors will say, “Oh, but that was a long time ago.” True, but what if you questioned the procedure in 1800? The doctors would say, “Look, I’m the expert here. This is what I do!” (hubris) 2) In 1847, Dr. Semmelweis suggested that the mortality rate in maternity wards could be reduced if doctors would wash their hands before tending to the delivery of a new baby. The medical profession laughed at him. Semmelweis's observations conflicted with the established scientific and medical opinions of the time. The theory of diseases was highly influenced by ideas of an imbalance of the basic "four humours" in the body, a theory known as dyscrasia, for which the main treatment was bloodlettings. Medical texts at the time emphasized that each case of disease was unique, the result of a personal imbalance, and the main difficulty of the medical profession was to establish precisely each patient's unique situation, case by case. It took the medical profession over twenty years to recognize the importance of sterility in hospital settings. The so-called Semmelweis reflex — a metaphor for a certain type of human behavior characterized by reflex-like rejection of new knowledge because it contradicts entrenched norms, beliefs or paradigms — is named after Semmelweis, whose perfectly reasonable hand-washing suggestions were ridiculed and rejected by his contemporaries. (hubris). 3) I hurt my back when I was fifteen. I went to our family doctor, then to the osteopath, and I received steroid shots. At the suggestion of going to see a chiropractor, the doctors explained to me they were “quacks” and could not fix my problem. Forty years ago the American Medical Association did not recognize chiropractors as legitimate doctors, and insurance companies would not cover chiropractic care. (hubris) Today however, when I have occasional back problems, I go see a chiropractor and come away fixed and feeling better. It took the medical profession over forty years to recognize that chiropractic treatments work. I could have told them that years ago, but would they have accepted it? (hubris). 4) When my father was 66 years old he was diagnosed with acute leukemia (true, it’s different from what I have), and he opted for the standard medical treatment. He went into the hospital, spent a year there, lost about 100 pounds, and died. Is that how I want to spend my last year of life? How many of you know Annelle Griffeth (Oviedo, FL)? She had cancer, received only a couple of chemo treatments, then quit and decided to do something different. She lives today. Ask her how her life is going. NOTE: The above discussion is not to say that any particular doctor is not humble, it is to say that the profession as a whole suffers from hubris.
I have drastically changed my diet: only fresh fruits, vegetables, raw nuts, etc. Often these are consumed in a juiced form. I also drink lots of herbal teas designed to help with this specific condition. I lost about 25 pounds so far (that can’t hurt) and I feel much better. On this diet my abdominal pains have disappeared, including the pain in my spleen, and the bloating and hardness in my abdomen has disappeared.
I am scheduled for a PET (Positron Emission Tomography) scan, February 26, 2010. These are so cool. They produce a three-dimensional image or picture of functional processes in the body. I recommend everyone get one (assuming your insurance will cover it) while you are healthy as it provides a baseline to compare a later abnormal condition to.
I will meet with the oncologist March 2, to review the PET scan and get another blood test. This blood test will determine the path I will take. If the Beta 2 Microglobulin and white blood cell numbers have increased, and the red blood cells, hemoglobin, and hematocrit numbers have fallen, then I will look harder at conventional chemo therapy. But if these numbers have improved, I will defer chemo treatment and continue my current path. We are hopeful. (See Moroni 7:42-44)
God has continued to bless me with faith and charity, as I asked in my prayers (see previous post). Weekly someone contacts me and explains that they put my name in yet another temple. People I baptized in Tennessee, Steve and Judy Lynn, and David and Carol Davenport have given me much support, and Elder Kirk Spencer, a missionary companion (now living in Texas) put my name in yet another temple. People I barely remember e-mail me or Debbie, or contact us through Facebook and bless me. I teach inmates at the Montana Department of Corrections, at four remote prison locations via interactive TV. This particular class starts at 8:00am. I have always been an early riser, but for a while it was getting much harder to get out of bed and get going. My face was puffy and I was extremely weak and sluggish. I felt an obligation to explain my poor lecture performance to my inmate students. One of them said he would pray for me. How many of you have high security prison inmates praying for you? God continues to bless me! (As a side note, since my lifestyle and diet change, the puffiness and sluggishness are gone). I feel great! I am looking forward to having a couple of baby calves on our property so my grandchildren can bottle feed them when they come up. Debbie and I look forward to gardening and growing our own fruits and vegetables, fertilized by our two calves. We have great plans for the future. The Lord also has plans for my future.
The Lord also has plans for my future. Did I say that already? One of the callings that I have always shied away from is Ward Mission Leader. I am not afraid of missionary work, I have been a stake missionary and a branch mission leader shortly after my baptism, and I served a full-time mission. But being the Ward Mission Leader is different. I have pondered various callings over the years and this one always gave me problems. Especially the word “Leader.” This implies that I cannot simply sit back and tell/teach others what and how to do missionary “work.” But to me it means I must do it, show the ward by example, and then say, “Come, follow me,” and “Do likewise.” This will require tremendous effort, prayer, and faith. That’s the “work” in missionary work. Being a man I naturally shy away from work like this. Notice the work “naturally” in the previous sentence? See Mosiah 3:19.
Two weeks ago Bishop Robinson (Kalispell 3rd Ward), knowing my health condition, after much prayer called me to be the Ward Mission Leader. I don’t know for certain if I will live, or when I will die. Nobody does. But God knows. And for now he wants me to serve as the Ward Mission Leader. I see this as yet another answer to my prayers for increased faith and charity. I will need them to serve as Father wants me to serve.
I know there is a God who dwells in yonder heavens. (See Joseph Smith, The King Follett Discourse, Ensign, April 1971; “There is the starting point for us to look to, in order to understand and be fully acquainted with the mind, purposes and decrees of the Great Eloheim, who sits in yonder heavens as he did at the creation of the world. God himself was once as we are now, and is an exalted man, and sits enthroned in yonder heavens!”) I know there is a God who dwells in yonder heavens. I know we are His children and he loves us. I have come to be acquainted much more intimately with Father, and his goodness, and kindness, and charity, and mercy, and great condensention towards His children, due to recent experiences that are a direct result of my attempts to gain greater faith and charity. When people pray in meetings, the words they say, which are sincere and genuine, have greater meaning and impact to me than ever before. I used to say similar words, and while I meant them, they have tremendously deeper meanings than they did before. The same holds true of scripture. The words have much deeper meaning than before. The same is true of hymns. I can now hardly sing them without weeping from an increased awareness of God’s love. This is the very thing I sought for when I began my quest for increased faith and charity. God answers prayers! I know and testify that Jesus Christ is the Savior of all mankind, whoever would have him to be their Lord and Master. Help me, Oh God, to submit my will. I know and testify the Book of Mormon is the word of God. I know and testify that Joseph Smith saw God the Father and Jesus Christ in the grove in upstate New York. I know and testify that there are prophets on the earth today, and the senior Apostle and Prophet Thomas Monson is the Lord’s mouthpiece on earth today to teach us how to return to Father. Help me, Oh God, to hear thy word. I know and testify that in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are all the priesthood keys and authority to do the Lord’s work on earth today. I know and testify that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the kingdom of God on the earth. Help me, Oh God, serve, sacrifice and build thy kingdom. In the words of Brigham Young, “The Kingdom of God, or nothing!”
To be continued.
I have drastically changed my diet: only fresh fruits, vegetables, raw nuts, etc. Often these are consumed in a juiced form. I also drink lots of herbal teas designed to help with this specific condition. I lost about 25 pounds so far (that can’t hurt) and I feel much better. On this diet my abdominal pains have disappeared, including the pain in my spleen, and the bloating and hardness in my abdomen has disappeared.
I am scheduled for a PET (Positron Emission Tomography) scan, February 26, 2010. These are so cool. They produce a three-dimensional image or picture of functional processes in the body. I recommend everyone get one (assuming your insurance will cover it) while you are healthy as it provides a baseline to compare a later abnormal condition to.
I will meet with the oncologist March 2, to review the PET scan and get another blood test. This blood test will determine the path I will take. If the Beta 2 Microglobulin and white blood cell numbers have increased, and the red blood cells, hemoglobin, and hematocrit numbers have fallen, then I will look harder at conventional chemo therapy. But if these numbers have improved, I will defer chemo treatment and continue my current path. We are hopeful. (See Moroni 7:42-44)
God has continued to bless me with faith and charity, as I asked in my prayers (see previous post). Weekly someone contacts me and explains that they put my name in yet another temple. People I baptized in Tennessee, Steve and Judy Lynn, and David and Carol Davenport have given me much support, and Elder Kirk Spencer, a missionary companion (now living in Texas) put my name in yet another temple. People I barely remember e-mail me or Debbie, or contact us through Facebook and bless me. I teach inmates at the Montana Department of Corrections, at four remote prison locations via interactive TV. This particular class starts at 8:00am. I have always been an early riser, but for a while it was getting much harder to get out of bed and get going. My face was puffy and I was extremely weak and sluggish. I felt an obligation to explain my poor lecture performance to my inmate students. One of them said he would pray for me. How many of you have high security prison inmates praying for you? God continues to bless me! (As a side note, since my lifestyle and diet change, the puffiness and sluggishness are gone). I feel great! I am looking forward to having a couple of baby calves on our property so my grandchildren can bottle feed them when they come up. Debbie and I look forward to gardening and growing our own fruits and vegetables, fertilized by our two calves. We have great plans for the future. The Lord also has plans for my future.
The Lord also has plans for my future. Did I say that already? One of the callings that I have always shied away from is Ward Mission Leader. I am not afraid of missionary work, I have been a stake missionary and a branch mission leader shortly after my baptism, and I served a full-time mission. But being the Ward Mission Leader is different. I have pondered various callings over the years and this one always gave me problems. Especially the word “Leader.” This implies that I cannot simply sit back and tell/teach others what and how to do missionary “work.” But to me it means I must do it, show the ward by example, and then say, “Come, follow me,” and “Do likewise.” This will require tremendous effort, prayer, and faith. That’s the “work” in missionary work. Being a man I naturally shy away from work like this. Notice the work “naturally” in the previous sentence? See Mosiah 3:19.
Two weeks ago Bishop Robinson (Kalispell 3rd Ward), knowing my health condition, after much prayer called me to be the Ward Mission Leader. I don’t know for certain if I will live, or when I will die. Nobody does. But God knows. And for now he wants me to serve as the Ward Mission Leader. I see this as yet another answer to my prayers for increased faith and charity. I will need them to serve as Father wants me to serve.
I know there is a God who dwells in yonder heavens. (See Joseph Smith, The King Follett Discourse, Ensign, April 1971; “There is the starting point for us to look to, in order to understand and be fully acquainted with the mind, purposes and decrees of the Great Eloheim, who sits in yonder heavens as he did at the creation of the world. God himself was once as we are now, and is an exalted man, and sits enthroned in yonder heavens!”) I know there is a God who dwells in yonder heavens. I know we are His children and he loves us. I have come to be acquainted much more intimately with Father, and his goodness, and kindness, and charity, and mercy, and great condensention towards His children, due to recent experiences that are a direct result of my attempts to gain greater faith and charity. When people pray in meetings, the words they say, which are sincere and genuine, have greater meaning and impact to me than ever before. I used to say similar words, and while I meant them, they have tremendously deeper meanings than they did before. The same holds true of scripture. The words have much deeper meaning than before. The same is true of hymns. I can now hardly sing them without weeping from an increased awareness of God’s love. This is the very thing I sought for when I began my quest for increased faith and charity. God answers prayers! I know and testify that Jesus Christ is the Savior of all mankind, whoever would have him to be their Lord and Master. Help me, Oh God, to submit my will. I know and testify the Book of Mormon is the word of God. I know and testify that Joseph Smith saw God the Father and Jesus Christ in the grove in upstate New York. I know and testify that there are prophets on the earth today, and the senior Apostle and Prophet Thomas Monson is the Lord’s mouthpiece on earth today to teach us how to return to Father. Help me, Oh God, to hear thy word. I know and testify that in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are all the priesthood keys and authority to do the Lord’s work on earth today. I know and testify that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the kingdom of God on the earth. Help me, Oh God, serve, sacrifice and build thy kingdom. In the words of Brigham Young, “The Kingdom of God, or nothing!”
To be continued.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Saturday, February 6, 2010
The Dying Saga of Garvin Smith – are you dying to read it? by Garvin Smith
This saga all started about August 2008. For several years prior I had been feeling that I was on a ‘spiritual plateau’. I was determined to get off this plateau and draw closer to Father. I pondered on what to do and came to the realization that I needed more faith. I also came to the realization that faith is a gift. (1 Cor. 12: 1 - 11; Moro. 10: 9 - 17) Faith is not something one can develop on one’s own. Through one’s obedience a person will gain more faith, but how did it come about? It came as God gave it as a gift to the person. One can do nothing on one’s own. (Matt. 6: 27; Luke 12: 25) I also began to pray for the gift of charity, as I recognized that my heart was not really full of God’s love.
So I began a quest to obtain more faith by praying, and asking God, for the gift of faith and the gift of charity. (D&C 46: 8) I remember telling Debbie at the time how sorry I was that she was going to suffer through things because of my prayers. I prayed this way, adding a prayer for the gift of charity, for months, knowing that these things take time. Finally, while sitting in the chapel of the temple, waiting for our February ward temple night session to begin, I had the distinct impression that I should quit my job. I know revelation when it comes to me. I joined the Church because the same thing happened to me: God spoke to me through the power of the Holy Ghost. Additionally, I learned for sure how God reveals things to me while on my mission. This direction to quit my job was that same kind of revelation.
It took me a full two weeks to come to grips with this revelation. After all, I was 55 years old, and we are currently in a bad recession. Finding a new job will be more difficult in these conditions, and I have never quit one job without already having another job. Nevertheless, I realized that this would be how God would increase my faith, and what did Nephi say about this? “I know that the Lord giveth no commandments unto the children of men, save he shall prepare a way for them that they may accomplish the thing which he commandeth them.” (1 Ne. 3: 7)
After two weeks I committed in my heart to quit my job. The time wasn’t right just then, only about one-fifth the way through the semester, and I was uncertain about teaching the Summer semester, but I made the commitment and God knew I had made it! No sooner had I made the commitment to quit did a job opportunity open up in Kalispell, Mt. Now, I had been looking at jobs across the country and especially in Missouri as we thought that’s where we were going. Often I would see an advertisement and think, “I could do that, with a little training”, or, maybe, “With a shoehorn I could squeeze into that job”. However, the job advertisement in Kalispell described me perfectly. I had every attribute they were looking for. So I submitted a resume’, was interviewed over Skype, and invited for an on-site interview. I got the job, because it was meant to be. Was my faith strengthened? Certainly. Good, that was over. However, I continued to pray for the gift of faith (fool that I am), the gift of charity, and after the Bigfork ward bishop taught the ward that we should pray for the gift of the Holy Ghost, I added that also. To top it off, I was also praying for the gift of gratitude.
Our house in Florida did not sell in August 2009 as planned and we moved from a friend’s travel trailer into a motel. Then we had a second buyer in late September, so we stayed in the motel, thinking we were going to close any day. That fell through, and in November we got our third buyer. This one is going to work, but it’s now mid January. However, I have learned to be grateful for what we have: a warm shelter from the elements. I have learned that we really don’t need too many things. Oh, they are nice, but they can become a beam of stumbling, blocking our vision from the eternally important things. I look forward to having a house and access to some of those vision blocking beam items at my disposal again.
January 4th I developed a bad stomach ache, not nausea, pain. This persisted for about three days and then settled into a pain on my left side. At first I thought appendicitis, but the pain was on the wrong side. I changed my diet, drank one half gallon of apple cider a day in an effort to “clean out.” It helped but usually about twelve hours after I would eat a meal, the pains would return. I was eating eight ibuprofens a day just to deal with the pain, but not eating much food. While in Texas for Adam’s baptism, we ate a CiCi’s pizza buffet. I started with a salad, but succumbed to pizza. Twelve hours later the pain was so intense that I could not sleep. The pain shot from my lower left side into my left shoulder. I had to sleep sitting up in a recliner. One week had gone by since my first stomach ache. I basically quit eating and the pain was generally gone, but my abdomen was hard and bloated. I continued to eat lightly and after almost two weeks, I decided to fast and get rid of what was ailing me.
At last I decided to go to the doctor. Some discussion occurred with the usual urine and blood tests. The blood tests revealed an elevated white cell count, but not consistent with a bacterial infection. I told the doctor that I had discovered a swollen lymph gland, and I had it since the time of my stomach ache. I was sent for at CT scan since I had been fasting. That night (7:30pm) the physician’s assistant called and said that, after some consultation, he feared that I had lymphoma, and suggested that I investigate cancer centers in Seattle or Portland.
I was devastated and scared. I refused to think about it Friday night, while Debbie buried herself in research. Saturday morning I went to work. I had some work to do, but I also needed to be alone. I cried. A lot. Not for me though, but for my children. My mother passed on when I was fifteen, and my father passed when I was 36. It hurt a lot at the time of my mother’s passing, but also after I was married with children of my own. I longed to be able to share my children with my mother, and to have her hold them and love them. That will never be. If I passed on now, some of my children would miss that same experience. I would also miss knowing my other boy’s wives. Not that I am anything special, but family ties are powerful. And then Hyrum would lose his father at seventeen.
After crying for a day I could compose myself for the most part, but whenever I would think about my children, I would cry again, like I am now as I type this story.
Saturday afternoon we went to see “My Turn on Earth” performed in our stake center, by the Salmon, Idaho stake. Mostly it was okay, but two things caused the tears to flow: when they sang the song, My Turn on Earth (some people get on and some people get off), and when they sang “Barbra, It’s time to come home.” “But I’m not ready.” One thing I would change about my life if I could is that I would watch that musical many more times, especially after watching a movie like “The Punisher”. Pondering on the truths expressed in the musical, I wondered if I had found “the treasure”, that Barbara had sought, as I have always struggled with empathy for others. However, based on the outpouring of love and concern from people who know me, I must have gathered some of the treasure, and I have faith in the incomprehensible love and condensation of God, and in the atoning power of the blood of His Lamb, our Savior, Jesus Christ, to cover and make up for my lack.
Sunday came and I hoped I could handle church. Hyrum had talked to the bishop, so he knew. He came to us and said that he was praying for us. I could hardly keep from crying. I couldn’t even sing the hymns any more. Interestingly, for the last several months I was having a hard time singing the hymns without crying during some part of the hymn. But then I didn’t know why.
Now I know that Father told me to quit my job. I know that we are supposed to be in Montana. But why? Why would Father bring us to the Rocky Mountains, let us languish in a motel for four months, just to have me die, leaving my wife and seventeen year-old son alone, without a home and all our stuff in storage units? Why? The answer remains yet to be revealed.
When I received my calling as High Priest Group secretary in November, the High Priest Group Leader, Brother Perrone, set me apart and blessed me saying, “You are working at your capacity.” I remember thinking, “You have no idea of my capacity”. Little did I know at that time what Father knew, and what He had prompted Brother Perrone to say.
Monday, January 18 came and I started school. A few of my former students noticed I looked thinner and questioned me about it. As of Thursday, January 21, I have lost about 15 pounds. This weight loss occurred in a matter of almost three weeks. Do you think there is something wrong with me? I mean my health, you wise guy!
Tuesday, January 19 I met with the oncologist who reviewed my test data to date. He pronounced that I most likely had one of three conditions: chronic lymphocytic leukemia, follicular lymphoma, or large B-cell lymphoma. Each of these would be stage four, as it is a blood cancer, so it would also be found in the bone marrow. He further pronounced that he would like to begin “treatment” as soon as possible. This treatment, known as “R-CHOP”, consists of five of the following nine drugs: Fludarbine, Rituximab, Cyclophospamide, Alemyuzumab, Bendamustine, Chlorambucil, Doxorubicin, Vincristine, and Prednisone, taken in eight cycles of three weeks for about five months. Initially, this appeared to be the way to go, because when you are initially faced with this situation one is unsure of what to do, so we follow the doctor’s advice. Upon reading the medical literature provided by the oncologist from a proprietary medical website, I discovered that doctors have not agreed upon any particular treatment series, but recommend that people enroll in a clinical trial! Additionally the literature reports that the success rate of this treatment method is 50 – 70 percent.
By this time news of my condition was starting to leak out. Soon Steve and JoAnna Ebanks invited us to Orlando to meet with their Chinese doctors that have been so helpful in nursing JoAnna back to health. Steve used some of his stash of frequent flyer miles to fly us to Orlando, picked us up at the airport, took us to their home, and JoAnna took us to the doctor the next day. I asked John Cyrocki, my former stake president and current member of the Orlando Temple presidency to give me a Father’s Blessing. He agreed and then spent the week pondering. He said in his first prayers, he was concerned because he was not my father. Then the Spirit told him, “Most of what we do in the temple is by proxy, this blessing is no different. So he then spent the next few days in prayer and meditation. He had Steve anoint me and then he gave me a father’s blessing. When he was finished with the father’s blessing, he sealed the anointing and gave me a blessing of health. The father’s blessing was much like my Patriarchal Blessing which John had never seen, nor had any knowledge of. During the blessing of health, the good cells were commanded to “rise up like the stripling warriors of Helaman and destroy the bad cells” in my body. Things are looking up. The Cyrocki’s then gave me an envelope that I thought contained a letter of counsel, encouragement, and love. Instead I found a manifestation of charity. Father is answering my prayer for the gift of charity by pouring out charity upon me in the form of love from my Church brothers and sisters. These acts of kindness by the Ebanks and the Cyrockis are yet another manifestation of God’s love.
I am reminded of the example of Joseph Smith, when word came to Nauvoo on one occasion of a poor man who had lost his house by fire. Nearly all the brethren said they were sorry for the man. The Prophet Joseph Smith put his hand in his pocket and pulled out a five-dollar gold piece and said, "I feel sorry for this brother to the amount of five dollars. How much do you feel sorry?"
While in Florida several people came by to wish us well and pray for us. My name has been placed in at least the following temples: Billings, Montana; Idaho Falls, Idaho; Provo, Utah; Salt Lake City, Utah; Washington DC; Raleigh North Carolina; Orlando, Florida. The Kalispell Third Ward is fasting for me this Sunday (February 2010); and during stake conference, President James Pratt of the Orlando, Florida Stake ask the members of the Orlando, Florida Stake to fast and pray for me. One of my students, Bruce Brown, a Messianic Jew, ask his congregation to pray for me. Another student from another class waited until class was over and the students were gone, then asked if he could pray for me right then. Of course I agreed, and he did.
Many others, many people, some whom I don’t even remember, e-mail us, or contact us on Facebook expressing their love and prayers. I am more grateful, and recognize this as Father teaching me by example about charity, and saying, “Now, go and do likewise.”
As I continue to suffer from thinking about my yearning for my own mother to be part of my family and to be able to hold my babies, which can never be, and for that which I will miss if I died soon, I recognized that my mother probably yearned for the same thing. It was then that I began to realize the power of those who have passed on in their yearning for family ties to be intact. I then began to realize the importance of family history and genealogical work. Then I remembered some words from my patriarchal blessing (as best as I can remember without reading my blessing): “At some future time I bless you to become interested in genealogy and to seek out your ancestors. I bless you to do a great work in genealogy.”
When you pray, with real intent, for the gift of faith, the gift of charity, the gift of the Holy Ghost, and the gift of gratitude, our loving Father will create experiences to develop these gifts in you.
I know and testify that there is a loving God in the heavens who looks over and loves His children here on the earth. I testify that He prepared a plan for us to have the opportunity to become like him and to live with His family forever. I testify that the plan requires that we come to this earth for a brief period, and that we need and must have the help of a Savior to be able to return to Father. I know that that savior is Jesus Christ and that he wrought the great and marvelous, eternal atonement whereby we can be covered, forgiven, purified, and made worthy to reenter the presence of our Holy Father and live with His family forever. I testify that this comes solely as a gift from God, and is unavailable as a result of anything we can do. I know that Joseph Smith was called of God to restore the gospel in its fullness to the earth. Joseph Smith saw God the Father and His son Jesus Christ.
I testify that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the Kingdom of God on the earth. I testify that the Holy Priesthood after the Order of the Son of God has been restored to the earth, and that it and all power and authority necessary to perform the required saving ordinances and preach the gospel and operate the Kingdom of God on the earth reside in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
I testify that the Book of Mormon is the word of God, and another testament of the Lord Jesus Christ, and that a man can get closer to God by abiding by its precepts than by any other book. Shortly after returning to Montana, during our family scripture study, we read these words, “For I perceive that ye desire that I should show unto you what I have done unto your brethren at Jerusalem, for I see that your faith is sufficient that I should heal you. And it came to pass that when he had thus spoken, all the multitude, with one accord, did go forth with their sick and their afflicted, and their lame, and with their blind, and with their dumb, and with all them that were afflicted in any manner; and he did heal them every one as they were brought forth unto him (3 Nephi 17:9-9).
We are moving forward. We made an offer on a second house, and it was accepted. We will soon be settling into our home and invite all to come visit us in “God’s country”. I promise you that that has greater meaning for me than ever before.
To be continued
So I began a quest to obtain more faith by praying, and asking God, for the gift of faith and the gift of charity. (D&C 46: 8) I remember telling Debbie at the time how sorry I was that she was going to suffer through things because of my prayers. I prayed this way, adding a prayer for the gift of charity, for months, knowing that these things take time. Finally, while sitting in the chapel of the temple, waiting for our February ward temple night session to begin, I had the distinct impression that I should quit my job. I know revelation when it comes to me. I joined the Church because the same thing happened to me: God spoke to me through the power of the Holy Ghost. Additionally, I learned for sure how God reveals things to me while on my mission. This direction to quit my job was that same kind of revelation.
It took me a full two weeks to come to grips with this revelation. After all, I was 55 years old, and we are currently in a bad recession. Finding a new job will be more difficult in these conditions, and I have never quit one job without already having another job. Nevertheless, I realized that this would be how God would increase my faith, and what did Nephi say about this? “I know that the Lord giveth no commandments unto the children of men, save he shall prepare a way for them that they may accomplish the thing which he commandeth them.” (1 Ne. 3: 7)
After two weeks I committed in my heart to quit my job. The time wasn’t right just then, only about one-fifth the way through the semester, and I was uncertain about teaching the Summer semester, but I made the commitment and God knew I had made it! No sooner had I made the commitment to quit did a job opportunity open up in Kalispell, Mt. Now, I had been looking at jobs across the country and especially in Missouri as we thought that’s where we were going. Often I would see an advertisement and think, “I could do that, with a little training”, or, maybe, “With a shoehorn I could squeeze into that job”. However, the job advertisement in Kalispell described me perfectly. I had every attribute they were looking for. So I submitted a resume’, was interviewed over Skype, and invited for an on-site interview. I got the job, because it was meant to be. Was my faith strengthened? Certainly. Good, that was over. However, I continued to pray for the gift of faith (fool that I am), the gift of charity, and after the Bigfork ward bishop taught the ward that we should pray for the gift of the Holy Ghost, I added that also. To top it off, I was also praying for the gift of gratitude.
Our house in Florida did not sell in August 2009 as planned and we moved from a friend’s travel trailer into a motel. Then we had a second buyer in late September, so we stayed in the motel, thinking we were going to close any day. That fell through, and in November we got our third buyer. This one is going to work, but it’s now mid January. However, I have learned to be grateful for what we have: a warm shelter from the elements. I have learned that we really don’t need too many things. Oh, they are nice, but they can become a beam of stumbling, blocking our vision from the eternally important things. I look forward to having a house and access to some of those vision blocking beam items at my disposal again.
January 4th I developed a bad stomach ache, not nausea, pain. This persisted for about three days and then settled into a pain on my left side. At first I thought appendicitis, but the pain was on the wrong side. I changed my diet, drank one half gallon of apple cider a day in an effort to “clean out.” It helped but usually about twelve hours after I would eat a meal, the pains would return. I was eating eight ibuprofens a day just to deal with the pain, but not eating much food. While in Texas for Adam’s baptism, we ate a CiCi’s pizza buffet. I started with a salad, but succumbed to pizza. Twelve hours later the pain was so intense that I could not sleep. The pain shot from my lower left side into my left shoulder. I had to sleep sitting up in a recliner. One week had gone by since my first stomach ache. I basically quit eating and the pain was generally gone, but my abdomen was hard and bloated. I continued to eat lightly and after almost two weeks, I decided to fast and get rid of what was ailing me.
At last I decided to go to the doctor. Some discussion occurred with the usual urine and blood tests. The blood tests revealed an elevated white cell count, but not consistent with a bacterial infection. I told the doctor that I had discovered a swollen lymph gland, and I had it since the time of my stomach ache. I was sent for at CT scan since I had been fasting. That night (7:30pm) the physician’s assistant called and said that, after some consultation, he feared that I had lymphoma, and suggested that I investigate cancer centers in Seattle or Portland.
I was devastated and scared. I refused to think about it Friday night, while Debbie buried herself in research. Saturday morning I went to work. I had some work to do, but I also needed to be alone. I cried. A lot. Not for me though, but for my children. My mother passed on when I was fifteen, and my father passed when I was 36. It hurt a lot at the time of my mother’s passing, but also after I was married with children of my own. I longed to be able to share my children with my mother, and to have her hold them and love them. That will never be. If I passed on now, some of my children would miss that same experience. I would also miss knowing my other boy’s wives. Not that I am anything special, but family ties are powerful. And then Hyrum would lose his father at seventeen.
After crying for a day I could compose myself for the most part, but whenever I would think about my children, I would cry again, like I am now as I type this story.
Saturday afternoon we went to see “My Turn on Earth” performed in our stake center, by the Salmon, Idaho stake. Mostly it was okay, but two things caused the tears to flow: when they sang the song, My Turn on Earth (some people get on and some people get off), and when they sang “Barbra, It’s time to come home.” “But I’m not ready.” One thing I would change about my life if I could is that I would watch that musical many more times, especially after watching a movie like “The Punisher”. Pondering on the truths expressed in the musical, I wondered if I had found “the treasure”, that Barbara had sought, as I have always struggled with empathy for others. However, based on the outpouring of love and concern from people who know me, I must have gathered some of the treasure, and I have faith in the incomprehensible love and condensation of God, and in the atoning power of the blood of His Lamb, our Savior, Jesus Christ, to cover and make up for my lack.
Sunday came and I hoped I could handle church. Hyrum had talked to the bishop, so he knew. He came to us and said that he was praying for us. I could hardly keep from crying. I couldn’t even sing the hymns any more. Interestingly, for the last several months I was having a hard time singing the hymns without crying during some part of the hymn. But then I didn’t know why.
Now I know that Father told me to quit my job. I know that we are supposed to be in Montana. But why? Why would Father bring us to the Rocky Mountains, let us languish in a motel for four months, just to have me die, leaving my wife and seventeen year-old son alone, without a home and all our stuff in storage units? Why? The answer remains yet to be revealed.
When I received my calling as High Priest Group secretary in November, the High Priest Group Leader, Brother Perrone, set me apart and blessed me saying, “You are working at your capacity.” I remember thinking, “You have no idea of my capacity”. Little did I know at that time what Father knew, and what He had prompted Brother Perrone to say.
Monday, January 18 came and I started school. A few of my former students noticed I looked thinner and questioned me about it. As of Thursday, January 21, I have lost about 15 pounds. This weight loss occurred in a matter of almost three weeks. Do you think there is something wrong with me? I mean my health, you wise guy!
Tuesday, January 19 I met with the oncologist who reviewed my test data to date. He pronounced that I most likely had one of three conditions: chronic lymphocytic leukemia, follicular lymphoma, or large B-cell lymphoma. Each of these would be stage four, as it is a blood cancer, so it would also be found in the bone marrow. He further pronounced that he would like to begin “treatment” as soon as possible. This treatment, known as “R-CHOP”, consists of five of the following nine drugs: Fludarbine, Rituximab, Cyclophospamide, Alemyuzumab, Bendamustine, Chlorambucil, Doxorubicin, Vincristine, and Prednisone, taken in eight cycles of three weeks for about five months. Initially, this appeared to be the way to go, because when you are initially faced with this situation one is unsure of what to do, so we follow the doctor’s advice. Upon reading the medical literature provided by the oncologist from a proprietary medical website, I discovered that doctors have not agreed upon any particular treatment series, but recommend that people enroll in a clinical trial! Additionally the literature reports that the success rate of this treatment method is 50 – 70 percent.
By this time news of my condition was starting to leak out. Soon Steve and JoAnna Ebanks invited us to Orlando to meet with their Chinese doctors that have been so helpful in nursing JoAnna back to health. Steve used some of his stash of frequent flyer miles to fly us to Orlando, picked us up at the airport, took us to their home, and JoAnna took us to the doctor the next day. I asked John Cyrocki, my former stake president and current member of the Orlando Temple presidency to give me a Father’s Blessing. He agreed and then spent the week pondering. He said in his first prayers, he was concerned because he was not my father. Then the Spirit told him, “Most of what we do in the temple is by proxy, this blessing is no different. So he then spent the next few days in prayer and meditation. He had Steve anoint me and then he gave me a father’s blessing. When he was finished with the father’s blessing, he sealed the anointing and gave me a blessing of health. The father’s blessing was much like my Patriarchal Blessing which John had never seen, nor had any knowledge of. During the blessing of health, the good cells were commanded to “rise up like the stripling warriors of Helaman and destroy the bad cells” in my body. Things are looking up. The Cyrocki’s then gave me an envelope that I thought contained a letter of counsel, encouragement, and love. Instead I found a manifestation of charity. Father is answering my prayer for the gift of charity by pouring out charity upon me in the form of love from my Church brothers and sisters. These acts of kindness by the Ebanks and the Cyrockis are yet another manifestation of God’s love.
I am reminded of the example of Joseph Smith, when word came to Nauvoo on one occasion of a poor man who had lost his house by fire. Nearly all the brethren said they were sorry for the man. The Prophet Joseph Smith put his hand in his pocket and pulled out a five-dollar gold piece and said, "I feel sorry for this brother to the amount of five dollars. How much do you feel sorry?"
While in Florida several people came by to wish us well and pray for us. My name has been placed in at least the following temples: Billings, Montana; Idaho Falls, Idaho; Provo, Utah; Salt Lake City, Utah; Washington DC; Raleigh North Carolina; Orlando, Florida. The Kalispell Third Ward is fasting for me this Sunday (February 2010); and during stake conference, President James Pratt of the Orlando, Florida Stake ask the members of the Orlando, Florida Stake to fast and pray for me. One of my students, Bruce Brown, a Messianic Jew, ask his congregation to pray for me. Another student from another class waited until class was over and the students were gone, then asked if he could pray for me right then. Of course I agreed, and he did.
Many others, many people, some whom I don’t even remember, e-mail us, or contact us on Facebook expressing their love and prayers. I am more grateful, and recognize this as Father teaching me by example about charity, and saying, “Now, go and do likewise.”
As I continue to suffer from thinking about my yearning for my own mother to be part of my family and to be able to hold my babies, which can never be, and for that which I will miss if I died soon, I recognized that my mother probably yearned for the same thing. It was then that I began to realize the power of those who have passed on in their yearning for family ties to be intact. I then began to realize the importance of family history and genealogical work. Then I remembered some words from my patriarchal blessing (as best as I can remember without reading my blessing): “At some future time I bless you to become interested in genealogy and to seek out your ancestors. I bless you to do a great work in genealogy.”
When you pray, with real intent, for the gift of faith, the gift of charity, the gift of the Holy Ghost, and the gift of gratitude, our loving Father will create experiences to develop these gifts in you.
I know and testify that there is a loving God in the heavens who looks over and loves His children here on the earth. I testify that He prepared a plan for us to have the opportunity to become like him and to live with His family forever. I testify that the plan requires that we come to this earth for a brief period, and that we need and must have the help of a Savior to be able to return to Father. I know that that savior is Jesus Christ and that he wrought the great and marvelous, eternal atonement whereby we can be covered, forgiven, purified, and made worthy to reenter the presence of our Holy Father and live with His family forever. I testify that this comes solely as a gift from God, and is unavailable as a result of anything we can do. I know that Joseph Smith was called of God to restore the gospel in its fullness to the earth. Joseph Smith saw God the Father and His son Jesus Christ.
I testify that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the Kingdom of God on the earth. I testify that the Holy Priesthood after the Order of the Son of God has been restored to the earth, and that it and all power and authority necessary to perform the required saving ordinances and preach the gospel and operate the Kingdom of God on the earth reside in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
I testify that the Book of Mormon is the word of God, and another testament of the Lord Jesus Christ, and that a man can get closer to God by abiding by its precepts than by any other book. Shortly after returning to Montana, during our family scripture study, we read these words, “For I perceive that ye desire that I should show unto you what I have done unto your brethren at Jerusalem, for I see that your faith is sufficient that I should heal you. And it came to pass that when he had thus spoken, all the multitude, with one accord, did go forth with their sick and their afflicted, and their lame, and with their blind, and with their dumb, and with all them that were afflicted in any manner; and he did heal them every one as they were brought forth unto him (3 Nephi 17:9-9).
We are moving forward. We made an offer on a second house, and it was accepted. We will soon be settling into our home and invite all to come visit us in “God’s country”. I promise you that that has greater meaning for me than ever before.
To be continued
Our FUTURE MONTANA HOME
Today, we found out...that the SELLERS of this home...accepted our offer...We signed the papers, today..on the counter offer...They accepted $45,000 LESS than what they wanted...After...inspections..etc. we hope to CLOSE by the end of this month...or early MARCH...
We had a totally different IDEA when we came to MONTANA.....a LOG HOME in the MOUNTAINS...but, as time went on..I felt we had to be CLOSER to town so that we could serve the church better..We needed a place that people to get to us easier...and visa versa... On this property, we can grow FRUIT TREES...berries..a garden...with a couple of cows or goats and some chickens...We won't have to worry about bears or mountain lions...being closer to town....Chances of deer will be MUCH LESS...so...in this manner...it will be SO MUCH more FRUITFUL....in nature...We will be able to do much on this "5" acres...There is a connecting 5 acres...and if we can...someday...we may buy it as well....But, for now...5 acres...will be plenty....(smile)
Here are the pictures:
We had a totally different IDEA when we came to MONTANA.....a LOG HOME in the MOUNTAINS...but, as time went on..I felt we had to be CLOSER to town so that we could serve the church better..We needed a place that people to get to us easier...and visa versa... On this property, we can grow FRUIT TREES...berries..a garden...with a couple of cows or goats and some chickens...We won't have to worry about bears or mountain lions...being closer to town....Chances of deer will be MUCH LESS...so...in this manner...it will be SO MUCH more FRUITFUL....in nature...We will be able to do much on this "5" acres...There is a connecting 5 acres...and if we can...someday...we may buy it as well....But, for now...5 acres...will be plenty....(smile)
Here are the pictures:
Friday, February 5, 2010
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